Category: “Profound” Thoughts

You Don’t Have to Quit Your Day Job


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Be an original and do things differently–but limit your risks.

This last week, I took a trip to Minnesota, and on the plane ride from California, I pulled out my Kindle and started reading “Originals” by Adam Grant. I had every intention of reading the entire flight, but I only made it past the first chapter before I was inspired to write this blog post.

I don’t want to talk about the actual book or the concept of”Originals” (though, it’s a good read so far!), but I do want to talk about something Grant said, and how doing something that doesn’t conform with the world around you involves taking risks–but not as many risks as you’d think.

When chasing creative success, a lot of people often have the idea that they need to go big or go home. Commit to the dream or inevitably fail. Grant wrote about notable cases of success over the years that involved original thinkers/non-comformists succeeding while still minimizing risks.

He wrote about well known originals like Bill Gates, Steve Wozniak, and the founders of Warby Parker who didn’t abandon their “safe” jobs and life plans to pursue their new concepts until momentum was already building.

Instead of quitting everything and jumping head first into their projects, they balanced both safety and risk until the risk became more stable. You don’t have to be a huge risk taker to be an original. In fact, those who minimize risks can find more success in their fields.

The Ultimate Creative Risk

So let’s talk about the biggest risk a creative person may deal with: Quitting your day job and depending on your creativity to pay the bills.

The desired outcome is to actually have enough money to pay the bills–the risk is having the math not work in your favor. I’ve had a lot of people tell me this is their goal. It’s a great goal to have–but does your day job need to be abandoned in the beginning of your journey? Or can you wait until you make enough progress with your dreams so that you can transition slowly from stable paycheck to dependable entrepreneurship?

Can you make the numbers work?

I love spreadsheets. To me, nothing is more comforting than seeing my life laid out in concrete numbers. I am risk averse. I do what’s safe and I calculate the pros and cons of just about every situation I enter. From career changes to driving in a snow storm. I don’t blindly jump into a situation I know nothing about.

If you are considering quitting your job to chase your creative dreams I want you to look at your life right now. What are your expenses? Do you have a family to take care of? Do you have a mortgage to pay for? Do you need healthcare? All of these things should be addressed before you even consider abandoning that stable paycheck to chase your dreams. It can all feel very overwhelming at first, but look at your expenses. Start calculating what areas you can cut down. Trim away anything that you don’t NEED. Compare your total expenses with your current income and savings.

Can you make the numbers work? Can you minimize the risks in your life?

You DOn’t Have to Do What Everyone Else Does: Make your own plan

I encourage you to make a plan. One of the scariest parts about abandoning your job is figuring out where your next payday will come from, but having a plan decreases risk.

How far along in your creative career are you? Do you have any sources of income that can grow? Include this in your spreadsheet. How many art shows can you do on the weekends? Do you have a savings built up that you can pull from as you progress? Do you have a partner or roommate that you can make a deal with?

Think of all of the possibilities of replacing your day job income and put it on your spreadsheet. How do the numbers look now? Probably still a little scary. Which is why I say: You don’t have to quit your day job.

You don’t have to go big or go home. You don’t have to focus all of your energy on your creativity. You can succeed creatively while still maintaining a sense of safety in your life.

Consider these 4 things before quitting your day job:

1. Balance your energy between creativity and income

When aspiring actors move to LA, they become waiters, bartenders, and fill other service positions. It’s not because they suck at acting or don’t have any other skills, it’s because they are balancing their energy/time output and their need to pay the bills.

If you want to pursue a creative career, how can you find a sense of safety while working on your dreams and still have enough energy to do creative work?

Maybe your current 9-5 job is too exhausting and leaves you with no energy to even think about your dreams when you get home. You don’t have to keep that job. Find something that gives you a paycheck and doesn’t sap your energy. There is no shame in working a service position or part-time gig. The only thing that matters is giving yourself a balance of time, energy, and money to pay the bills.

2. Don’t ask too much of your creativity

I have to point to another book here. “Big Magic” by Elizabeth Gilbert. I don’t remember where in the book, and I don’t remember the exact quotes, but Gilbert writes about how unfair it can be to put expectations on your creativity to make money.

How asking so much of it can actually push it away. I can confirm in my own life that the moments where I need to produce something in order to make money are the least enjoyable creative exercises for me. The moments where my creativity wanes and the pressure to produce waxes can feel soul crushing.

Some people thrive under pressure, but many people like me crumble. In order to nurture your creativity, sometimes it’s best to take away the burden to make money. Take the pressure to create away.

If you quit your day job, how much pressure will that add to your creative process? How will that pressure change you and how much you enjoy what you do?

Maybe you will be the person who always has a day job. Maybe your creativity is there just for you. Maybe down the road it will take off and suddenly become your main source of income. There is no wrong way to be a creative person, but if you find that pressure to create makes you miserable and unproductive–then don’t quit your day job. Remove that burden from your creativity.

3. Life informs your Creativity

Another reason why you don’t need to quit your day job is that creativity needs fuel, and life is like gasoline.

If you are a writer, you may have noticed that you need to experience life to really flesh out what you write. Work places expose us to different people, situations, characters, and problems to solve. Sometimes a day job is exactly what we need to inspire and inform our creativity.

Instead of quitting your day job, look at how it can actually fuel you. This is the same for anyone considering quitting school to chase a dream. I may have quit the art program in college, but I shifted my focus to other areas that would still feed my creativity. How can you do the same?

4. Do you just need to rest?

You may be wondering why I’m encouraging you not to quit your day job to pursue a creative career, when I did that exact thing. I know I’ve mentioned this before, but when I quit my last full time job, it wasn’t because I so desperately wanted to just focus on my art. It was because I was deeply, dysfunctionally depressed. I started to have panic attacks at my work desk. I couldn’t focus on simple tasks. I was stressed and unhappy and I simply couldn’t be a productive employee much longer.

I used art as an excuse, but I knew I needed to just stay still for a moment–a week, a month, maybe even a year. I would tell people I was going to focus on art, and in a sense I did, but I didn’t have any real plan to make it a business. I just needed to make myself feel productive while I healed my mind, and so I painted and shared it with the world.

If you have dreams of quitting your job and working on art all day–is it because you are so fired up about your craft and you have a plan to make it into a business? Or, do you just need to rest (or maybe even find a new job)?

Mental health is talked about a lot these days, but not enough. There are so many of us that struggle with daily life. It’s perfectly fine to dream about an escape and to think about doing art all day. It might be exactly what you need. Just do yourself a favor and remove the pressure to make money from it. I can speak from experience that the pressure to make money while healing can just perpetuate the negative health state you’re already in.

If you need a rest, then take one. Truly. Use art as therapy until you feel whole again, and consider finding a new job that isn’t as mentally taxing if you aren’t financially able to take time off.

***

You don’t have to quit your day job in order to succeed as a creative person. Take a look inside of yourself and see what YOU need in order to take care of yourself and your creativity and carve your own path. Day job, side hustle, part time gig, or whatever–just do what’s right for you and take care of your responsibilities.

Please leave questions and comments below while commenting is open or reach out to me directly through Instagram or email. I’d love to hear from you! Make sure to sign up for my email list below to never miss a blog post. New posts are published every Tuesday. And if you’d like to see more content like this in the future, consider becoming a Patron of mine! (See details below.)

-Kelly

Do want to help me create more blog content? I want to keep providing content like this for free, but I need your help. If you enjoy my blog posts and gain any inspiration from the content I put out there, please consider becoming a Patron of Messy Ever After on Patreon. Pledging just $1 a month enables me to keep helping artists like you. Plus, you get extra little perks!

Become a Patron
Further Reading:
How to Move Past Failure and Believe in Yourself
Are You Waiting for Permission to be an Artist?

How to Move Past Failure and Believe in Yourself

How I keep moving forward after my many many failures.

When I was a kid, I believed I could do anything. I would happily sing Spice Girls and imagine myself being equally famous some day. I ran around the yard and mixed potions out of collected rainwater and colorful leaves, dreaming of being a scientist–or a witch. Both were viable options. When I experimented with my own apple cinnamon muffin recipe when I was nine, I fully believed I could run my own bakery in the future.

When I started skateboarding when I was thirteen I imagined becoming pro. Same with snowboarding. Never mind the fact that I had few skills and a very VERY low pain tolerance. (I’ve still got a scar on my hip from a graceful belly flop onto a sidewalk…)

I dreamed about all of the different lives I could choose for myself. I didn’t see obstacles. I didn’t see limitations. I saw a thing that I enjoyed doing, and a vision for what life would look like if I pursued it. I was also having a fantastic time.

I believed in myself. And–

Believing in yourself is the most important thing you can do to move past failures.

I didn’t succeed at any of those dreams (yet). You could say I failed at every one of them if you look at the definition of failure as a lack of success. You could even say that I’m failing at my current dreams depending on how you look at it. A few recent failures prompted me to write this post. I found myself looking at job listings online, because maybe, just maybe I should explore other non-creative career options.

But that lasted all of ten minutes, before I started giving myself this pep talk and turned it into a blog post.

Many of us fear failure, as if it defines us or is a permanent state, but I define failure as accepting an unexpected outcome without further action. So if I applied for a job for someone else and gave up on this whole creative pursuit of mine–then that would be failure.

You’re going to fail many times in life. A lack of success happens over and over again. The important thing is what you do after each failure and how you convince yourself to keep moving forward.

And that’s where the belief in yourself comes in.

Three Reasons Why You Need to Believe in Yourself:

  1. Belief fuels you to continue moving forward.
  2. Belief makes the present moment more enjoyable and worthwhile.
  3. Belief turns failure into opportunity.

Belief is a catalyst. If you belief you can do something, you are pushed to pursue it. You are charged up by the pursuit of a possibility. It doesn’t really matter what exactly you believe you can accomplish, and it doesn’t matter if you ever reach your end goal. Just having belief that the future will look the way you want can make every mundane and arduous task ahead of you seem more enjoyable.

Believing in yourself assigns you a purpose. It makes everything you do have meaning.

What happens when you don’t believe in yourself:

  1. You don’t move forward (because what’s the point, right?)
  2. You may depend on others to hold you up and encourage you.
  3. You abandon your dreams before you even try to reach them.
  4. You don’t enjoy the present moment.
  5. You internalize failure.
  6. You become a pessimist.

If belief in yourself is a catalyst that moves you forward, a lack of belief will hold you right where you are. Look at all those unpleasant side effects of not believing in yourself. Are you ready to believe?

How to Believe in Yourself Right Now and Move Past Failure

I spent a long time not believing in myself. I lost the thirteen year old skater punk, and the nine year old baker and became a pessimist for years. For the last three years, I have been rewiring my brain and have worked hard at reclaiming my belief in myself. Now, I’ll share with you how I’ve done it.

1. Challenge your negative confirmation bias.

When I was a pessimist, I was always looking for proof that I sucked. Proof I couldn’t succeed. Total confirmation bias on my part. I believed I couldn’t succeed, so I found evidence that supported that belief everywhere I looked.

I had to turn off this thought pattern. The first step was recognizing when my brain latched onto a negative belief, and then saying “Whoa there, Kelly. You don’t have to think this thought.” or “Whoa there, Kelly, why are you searching for jobs that you know won’t fulfill you?!”

Recognize when you are following this thought pattern and stop it in its tracks. Overtime, you can replace this with a positive thought pattern and train your confirmation bias to work in your favor.

If I tell you to notice the color red, you’ll start picking it out in the environment around you. If I tell you to see all the areas where you are succeeding, you’ll do the same. Don’t tell your brain to see all of your failures.

2. Realize you don’t need proof to believe in yourself.

You don’t need to know you will succeed to believe you can succeed. Knowing and believing are two different things. Belief needs no evidence.

I repeat: YOU DON’T NEED TANGIBLE EVIDENCE TO BELIEVE POSITIVE THINGS ABOUT YOURSELF.

You don’t need anyone to tell you what you’re capable or incapable of doing. Though, if you meet someone who excitedly encourages you to do the things you love and makes you feel like you can take on any obstacle in your way, keep them around. Those people are the best. Just don’t depend on them to replace your inner belief.

3. Do what a person who believes would do.

Remember when I said a lack of belief holds you back and belief moves you forward? Belief may be a catalyst, but you can still move forward without consciously believing in yourself. It just takes a little more work.

Our brains are big and powerful, but sometimes our conscious mind is a little slow to pick up on the benefits of positive habits. You don’t have to think “I can do it!” You don’t have to have mantras or sticky notes on your mirror with affirmations. You don’t have to gush positivity. You can start by simply taking the same step that a person who does believe in themselves would take. It’s a little “fake it ’til you make it”, but I stand by it.

If you want to run a marathon, but don’t believe you can, what would people who believe in themselves do? Get out of bed early and run? Do that.

What would a painter who believes they can make a living from their art do? Find the person doing what you want to do and mimic their actions. Let their belief carry you until yours develops.

4. Take power away from “success”.

Success isn’t everything. One way to prevent the sting of failure is to take the power away from success. Don’t hold tightly to your expectations. For example, if you want to learn how to draw hyper-realistic portraits, start by learning the basics. Break your goal down into the smallest tasks you can and build incremental success. Don’t expect to achieve your main goal right away.

Sharpen a pencil. Get out a pad of paper. Find a reference photo. Put the pencil to paper. Draw a single line. Draw another line. Shade over here. Shade over there. Don’t psych yourself out by thinking you have to draw technically perfect portraits right away, or even at all. Focus on the actions you can complete right now and don’t focus on your expectation for the end.

Recognize each task as a moment for success. Sharpen a pencil=Success. Draw a line=success.

***

Alright, I’m feeling sufficiently pepped, and all job hunting browser tabs have been closed. I hope you enjoyed this post and found a little encouragement to believe in yourself as well! What’s the worst that could happen? 😉

Please leave questions and comments below while commenting is open or reach out to me directly through Instagram or email. I’d love to hear from you! Make sure to sign up for my email list below to never miss a blog post. New posts are published every Tuesday. And if you’d like to see more content like this in the future, consider becoming a Patron of mine! (See details below.)

-Kelly

Do want to help me create more blog content? I want to keep providing content like this for free, but I need your help. If you enjoy my blog posts and gain any inspiration from the content I put out there, please consider becoming a Patron of Messy Ever After on Patreon. Pledging just $1 a month enables me to keep helping artists like you. Plus, you get extra little perks!

Become a Patron
Further Reading:
How to Take a Step Toward Your Dreams
Are You Waiting for Permission to be an Artist?

The sort of Stereotypical Story of an Artist with Depression

The sort of stereotypical story of an artist with depression.

And her stupidly simple recipe for happiness.

Hey! I’m Kelly. The artist behind Messy Ever After.  I was a quirky and shy kid that developed a profound sense of misery in my teens. First triggered by the outside world, and then inflicted and perpetuated by my flawed coping mechanisms.

I know, I know. An artist with depression. How cliché.

This story isn’t unique. The life events that led me to my darkness aren’t profound or dramatic. I mean, some of the stories are dramatic, but I’ll save that for my memoir *laughs to herself*. There are too many ways to find yourself lost in the dark so I don’t see the value in dredging up the specific woes of my past, but I’ll give you an outline of how they affected my behavior.

For the last 12 years, I have existed in a state of anxious frenzy. I bounced around between colleges, jobs, and relationships while trying to fill the void that was inside of me. It took me so long to realize how unhealthy I was. I was functionally depressed. Most people didn’t know until I inevitably word-vomited all over them,“I’m not a functional human being!!!” or something similar to that. My grades never suffered. I was a great employee. I always had long term relationships, but in every scenario, I would hit a breaking point and flee to the next thing that would distract me from my pain.

Rather, distract me from myself.

To anyone who was a victim of my selfish pursuits to find relief, I can only apologize and say that damaged people far too easily damage others. Especially those who are close to them. I should know. It’s my origin story.

But, this post isn’t about being depressed. This post is about the transition to finding happiness. It just took me a really long time to get here…

How did I do it? It’s SO easy *insert eye-roll*. Just kidding. This was the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life (next to quitting my job and pursuing art as a legit full time career). I don’t know if my methods will work for other people. I’m not writing this to tell you what to do with your life.

I’m actually writing this, because I had a solo art show and in a fit of honesty I decided to make my struggles with mental illness the focal point of my show. For a reclusive introvert, I do weird things sometimes…

Here’s my recipe to shining a light in the darkness:

  1. Recognize personal weaknesses without judgment and objectively realize there is a butt-ton of work to do. Emphasis on “without judgment”.
  2. Rest. Being depressed takes a lot of energy. Recharge that battery!
  3. Gratitude. It’s time to focus on all the good things! Make them up if needed.
  4. Mindfulness. Catch the brain when it goes down a dark path and throw up a road block.
  5. Love. Stop being mean. Learn to love yourself and truly accept love from others.

Now, the next sections got way longer than I intended. It’s hard to jam an entire mental ‘rebirth’ process into an easily consumable blog post. You’ve been warned.

1. Recognizing my weaknesses without judgment.

I came to a painful realization last summer. I am incredibly f*$%ed up. It was painful for a moment, and then surprisingly empowering. I mean, I always knew I was a bit off—but it never fully sunk in until I partnered up with the sanest, calmest, most emotionally stable nerd I have ever met. It’s similar to my being aware that I’m short, but fully realizing it when standing next to someone over a foot taller than me—you know?

Anyway, I wasn’t throwing the usual pity party for myself during this epic realization. (I had already done that for months before this moment.) I was calmly assessing my behaviors and I realized I did a lot of things that were counterproductive to happiness.

Rumination, judgment, complaining, passive-aggression, pessimistic and cynical thoughts, pushing people away, over-reacting, over-analyzing, self-sabotaging, externalizing my misery by blaming others and more. Over the years, I had turned into this little darkness monster rolled up in a tiny little package. Sometimes I imagine this as a little black fur ball that just gnashes its teeth in the corner of the room…

I find there are three schools of thought on the origins of depression. Either it’s chemical, environmental, or behavioral. I happen to believe it’s all three, but I had really only tackled the chemical and environmental factors of my darkness up until that point.

I’m sure multiple people told me this in my past, but I wasn’t ready to believe it. You can control your emotions, your mind, and your behavior. And your behavior (mental and physical), rewires your brain to be depressed or to be happy. You have the power to rewire it in either direction. The kindest and most giving soul I know actually told me this a while ago and I snapped at her, because again tiny little darkness monster = me.

I sound like a delight, huh? I finally had enough and I sat down and looked at myself. I saw all of these things with painful clarity—but I didn’t get down about it. Frankly, don’t think I could be anymore down at that moment.

Here I was: Flawed. Broken. Damaged. But oh-so lovable.

It took me a long time to finally come to the conclusion that things can only change if I change myself. I spent so many years trying to control my environment, while never asking myself if I can change how I react with the world. I just assumed I was wired a certain way and couldn’t change that.

I was trying to protect myself and my identity, and unknowingly shaped myself into the tiny little darkness monster.

2. Rest: Now that I know the problem—I stopped picking at it.

It hurts to hurt and it’s exhausting to be exhausted. But, unlike there being many paths into the darkness, there are few surefire ways to get out of it. Over the years, I have tried a variety of things that helped alleviate my pain, but never solved the problem. Counseling, anti-depressants, anti-anxiety meds, exercise, sleeping a solid 8-9 hours a night, a healthy diet, avoiding negative people, avoiding negative work environments or toxic situations, reading self help books, yoga, talking it out, keeping it in—and so much more. I never stopped trying to find ways to fix my depression.

I never rested.

I always had this stubborn belief that depression wasn’t permanent for me. I so desperately wanted to be happy. I believed it had a cause, so it must have a solution. I would spend hours trying to pick it apart and dissect all of my pieces hoping I would eventually have an ‘ah ha!’ moment. You may already know this, but this was probably the WORST possible thing I could have done to myself, and I did it for years.

After analyzing all of the things about myself that I needed to improve, I finally gave myself a long moment to actually rest and boy did it feel WRONG.

I was so used to my brain going a mile a minute with all the things I need to do in life so the silence was maddening. I spent a week doing hippy dippy things. I read a book about how various cultures pray (I’m not religious). I did yoga, walked the dog, and ran a bunch. I meditated. My mind hates being quiet, so that was not easy.

I rested. I gave myself permission to just enjoy existing. I didn’t think about making money. I didn’t push myself to do anything. I didn’t even work on art. I woke up, acknowledged the weather, moved my body, controlled my mind.

When we need to heal, we need to learn to rest. Truly rest.

3. Gratitude: How I shifted my perspective to “Just think about how good you have it!”

If you experience depression, I’m sure you’ve heard some form of this statement. “Just think happy thoughts!” I was always really annoyed when people would say “Just think about how good you have it!” because I thought I couldn’t! I literally could not feel happy—so what good would happy thoughts do for me?

During my week of hippy dippy rest, I tried this out. The annoying people were right—you really should think happy thoughts. Through this practice, I realized that I was so used to being unhappy, that my behavior patterns reinforced it all the time.

Thinking about how good you have it doesn’t mean that you don’t have the right to feel what you are feeling. Also, it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t or can’t feel shitty when your life sucks. Sometimes, life does suck. It just means, if you actually want to feel better, you need to change your behavior and train your brain to recognize happiness when it happens.

You can’t linger in the shitty places and expect things to improve.

I began forcing myself to focus on gratitude. Every night, I would lie in bed and go through my list of ‘happy thoughts’. Even and especially if I didn’t feel it. “I’m thankful I can focus on art. I’m thankful my nerdy other half loves me even though I’m unstable . I’m thankful I gained new Instagram followers today. I’m thankful the sun was out. I’m thankful I have enough money to buy all the fruit I want when I grocery shop. I’m thankful my dog is cute even though it’s annoying when he stares at me from across the room to signal it’s time to poop.” and the list goes on. Each night, the list got longer. Each morning, I woke up feeling just a little bit lighter.

I had this hysterical  (not hysterical ‘haha,’ but hysterical ‘she needs to be committed’) moment in July of 2016, when I was at a low point I was sobbing at 1:00am while my nerdy other half tried to console me. I didn’t realize I was inconsolable and content in my misery until he said “Tell me something you are thankful for.” My brain shorted out. I stopped crying and felt a sense of rage when I looked at him. This little darkness monster was defiantly screaming out from the darkness “How dare you interrupt my wallowing!” *gnashes teeth*

Over the decade or more of my depression, I effectively rewired my brain to be at home with the darkness. Despite the fact that I so desperately wanted to be free of it, I was reinforcing it on a daily basis with my thoughts.

Even though when I started my routine, I felt nothing good—but the more I practiced gratitude, the more I had to be thankful for and the more I could celebrate small accomplishments. To this day, I am still rewiring my brain to seek happiness instead of pointing out deficiencies.

Reality hasn’t changed, but my perspective did.

4. Mindfulness: How I took control of my brain, my emotions, and my anxiety.

Again, my mind goes a mile a minute and my resting heart rate is usually around 80 beats per minute. I’m a bit of a high strung individual. Pro tip: If this sounds like you, stop drinking caffeine. *gasp* “Oh the horror!” But seriously, consider it.

I have always been a highly reactive person. Emotionally and physically. I always believed this was my default setting, but it turns out I could actually learn how to control my reactivity through mindfulness. Let’s say someone says a mean comment. What I used to do was spiral into a pit of misery and ruminate for days. Now, I stop and take a deep breath. I acknowledge that what I interpreted hurt me—but did that person really intend to hurt me? Do I need to feel upset? Why does it upset me?

I ask myself all of these questions to defuse my emotions—and then I go on my with day.

When I am feeling depressed, I acknowledge it, but I don’t let the negative thoughts continue. I don’t ruminate like I used to, because I’m aware it doesn’t help. When I catch my mind wandering, I pull it back and try to quiet the chaos. I do this over and over again and combine it with gratitude. The depression was still active in the background, but I was able to focus on something more productive until it passed.

I’m still working on mindfulness every day, but it has helped me gain control of myself.

5. Love: How I learned to love myself and accept love from others.

I had two huge problems with love. One, I didn’t know how to love myself. Two, I didn’t know what healthy love from those closest to me was supposed to look like.

When I was younger, I witnessed a lot of dysfunctional relationships, and so I learned how to form my own dysfunctional bonds. I also never learned to put much faith in myself or form a firm sense of identity. I was constantly searching for someone to help me stuff the gaping hole in my heart—and I was the only person who could do this. It just took a very long time to learn that and to find the strength to work on myself.

Since I can remember, I punished myself for my flaws and never allowed myself to celebrate my accomplishments. And when those closest to me would compliment me, I wasn’t able to fully believe their words. Ultimately, I didn’t feel like I was worth loving.

I’m actually not sure how I did this—but I decided to be kind to myself. I decided to cut myself slack for my flaws and to start celebrating every little accomplishment I make. When you are depressed and you start to come out of it and do daily tasks without the lethargy and malaise you normally experience—life is pretty spectacular. When you can look at all of the things you do and love yourself fully—flaws and all—it opens up your ability to give more love to others.

Loving yourself is the best thing you will ever do for your sense of well being.

***

There you have it. My recipe for happiness. I must say that I am still working on all of these every day. I haven’t experienced a deep and prolonged bout of depression since my sudden mental shift last summer. And boy, have there have been plenty of opportunities where the old me would have found her way to the darkness.

I am not medicated, and that’s a personal choice. I have no judgment for anyone who chooses that path. For me, medication didn’t ‘fix’ the underlying behavioral issues.

Everyone is different, and I do not intend to tell you what to do with your life and your mental health. That’s your personal journey. My only intention with this is to share my journey.

Thank you for reading and let me know if you have any thoughts or comments on the matter!

-Kelly

One of the Worst Quotes on the Internet

‘Blank’ is the New Beautiful